relationships

26 Things You Forgot You Knew

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We’ve had a busy last week and it took until the end of it to finally start feeling some continuity and flow around here.  Student Goals Conferences on Wednesday aided to the feeling of disjointedness but I hope they were as valuable for you as they were for me.  On Wednesday and I had a lot of great conversations with students, parents, and teachers.  Many of those discussions came back around to things we’ve talked about before.  If it wasn’t me saying it, then is was usually the other person in the conversation, something to the effect of “this is a good reminder of what we need to be doing.”   

How easy it is for us to lose sight of things that we’ve previously viewed as priorities.  At the beginning of the year we talked a lot about building positive relationships with our students, we’ve come back to this at various times throughout the year but it seems to be one of those things that we overlook or assume has already happened and therefore can be forgotten.  However, those relationships don’t end…ever…especially when we are talking about teenagers!!  In fact, it is probably even more crucial to focus on relationships when you consider the culture our students come from, one that is very social and relationship focused.

I was once again reminded of the importance of these relationships when I came across a great piece called “26 Research-Based Tips You Can Use in the Classroom Tomorrow”.  I’m a huge fan of “ready to use” tools and these 26 tips are just that!  Some of them may be more relevant to you than others but there are a few that I think everyone would really benefit from thinking about and prioritizing (for more information on these select examples, click the link above):

Tip #1:   Focusing on building positive relationships by greeting students at the door and starting off with a positive comment, research indicates that it can improve student engagement by as much as 27%!!  

Tip #3:  We’ve talked before about the value of trying new classroom arrangements and making seating a priority for learning.  The study referenced in “tip #3” discusses the benefits and disadvantages of different types of seating arrangements.  However, most importantly, it points out that no matter the arrangement, when moving kids from the “back” to the “front” of the classroom their academic achievement increases.  Obviously you can’t sit everyone in “front” all the time but consciously changing seating arrangements and groupings to rotate kids for their benefit can have a very positive impact.

Tip #12:  The classic “turn and talk” strategy strikes again.  In this ready to use tip we’re reminded that recalling and using information we’ve just learned can help us retain it.  Have your kids briefly discuss new information shortly after learning it to help imprint it more solidly in their minds.  Ever learned someone’s name and repeated it to yourself a few times…yup, you’re doing the same thing!

Tip #16:  Do you ever have the feeling that your students think they understand something better than they actually do?  Well, it’s true…most people actually experience this phenomenon.  For more complex topics (research doesn’t show positive results for more basic concepts) have students think or write about their understanding of the topic, this could be a good “exit ticket” prompt.  This will help them (and, in the case of the exit ticket, it will help you too) realize their gaps in the understanding…now the trick is getting them to fill in those gaps!!

Tip #20:  I found this tip especially interesting.  While many of these things felt like good reminders, this tip was new for me.  Don’t put text on your PowerPoint Slides!  The double input of reading and hearing the information creates something called “cognitive overload” and can prevent people from actually retaining the information.  This article is very interesting and definitely worth exploring a bit more, especially if you’re a frequent PowerPoint presenter!  

Tip #22:  Lastly, and again something new for me, comes this tip that seems a bit like plain, old common sense.  The use of multiple choice assessments may actually be causing your students to learn the wrong information.  By presenting them with wrong answers to consider they may be internalizing those wrong answers as correct.  Better to go with fill in the blank or short answer.  While more time consuming to create and assess these will help your students better learn and recall important information.  

Okay, my intention was to only share five tips but I got a little carried away (what’s new?!?)  This article is definitely worth a look as the other 20 tips are also very helpful and applicable to many of your contexts.

I wrote recently about re-prioritizing and focusing our efforts on what is most important.  This article is a helpful reminder about some of those things that may need to be prioritized in our classrooms.  Take a look and see what will work for you.  Just like the title of the article suggests, these are things you can start using tomorrow 🙂

 

Seeking Perspective and Finding It

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I’ve had a lot of conversations this past week that have really given me reason to step back and try to appreciate other perspectives.  As part of the mindfulness work I’ve been doing I’ve learned more about the importance of being able to step back and give myself perspective about my own thoughts.  This combination of considering my own thoughts from a different perspective as well as trying to approach conversations with other people the same way has really begun to spin things for me.  

It often times gets very difficult to stop and consider other people’s perspectives when you are in the midst of a (heated?) conversation.  I mean, really, when you’re right why consider other perspectives?!?  Well, the thing is, a lot of times when we think we’re right (and we are) so is the other person!  It’s true, it’s possible, people can disagree but both be right!!  It’s all about perspective…

Last week I had a conversation with a student, I approached it from a closed perspective but luckily caught myself mid-way through.  See, I was right, had to be.  He was disrespectful to a bus monitor, arriving to the bus late and then screaming foul language at her.  Not okay, anywhere, anytime.  BUT, he was ‘right’ too…only I wasn’t allowing myself to see this because his behavior was so intolerable that it needed to be addressed, now!  He wasn’t too keen to agree with me, in fact he felt like there was a great injustice being exacted upon him.  This is when it hit me…perspective.  I stopped talking, I listened and asked questions to begin to understand his perspective.  He had felt wronged and unfairly treated…so to him, he was the one who was right.  At the end of the conversation we realized, together, that his understanding of the situation had actually been skewed and he acknowledged that his behavior was unacceptable.  Perspective allowed this conversation to resolve successfully.  I realized I needed to see his and he came around to seeing mine after I gave him the courtesy of listening and understanding his perspective.  

This happens all the time at school, especially in interactions between students and teachers/administrators.  We’re the adults and therefore, obviously, can see everything clearly.  In fact we often operate without all the information and still believe that we have to be right…which, sorry to say, might not be fair.  Now, I will concede that it is often the case as I shared above; the students have a different version of reality than us.  When this happens, even if we believe that we are seeing things clearly, we still need to stop to understand their perspective.  If we don’t, when they (inevitably) tuck their tail between their legs and ‘agree’, they will still hold animosity because they feel wronged.  However, by taking the time to understand their perspective and giving it the respect they feel it deserves we can better resolve any situation without (or at least with less) lingering animosity.

The lesson I’ve learned through my mindfulness work is, during meditation, to allow our mind to have thoughts but instead of chasing them to sit back and acknowledge them without any judgement.  By doing this you take a perspective on your thoughts, ideas, and beliefs that you previously may not have had.  I’ve realized that we must approach more of our conversations, especially the difficult conversations, with a non-judgmental perspective.  By doing this we will begin to see how other perspectives might actually make sense, even if we don’t particularly agree.  Rising to this level of understanding can lead to calmer, less stressful conversations, interactions, and lives.

So, give it a shot.  Try to release judgment from yours and other people’s perspectives, step back and watch the cars go by instead of chasing traffic!  I bet you’ll appreciate the results!!

 

CAISSA for the Win

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This week/end we’ve been busy hosting the CAISSA regional sports tournament.  With visiting schools from Venezuela, Dominican Republic, Trinidad & Tobago, and Cayman Islands it’s been a great experience for everyone involved.  

As the days rolled on I took a few moments to sit back and reflect on everything that I’ve seen and heard during CAISSA, it’s been interesting.  I want to share some of the observations I’ve made and how they are a positive for not only our community but all of those who’ve been involved.

  1. School isn’t exclusively about textbooks and exams!  The lessons that have been learned during this event have been incredible.  There have been lessons on sportsmanship (with examples of the good as well as, unfortunately, the bad).  We’ve seen our AC students come out and support their classmates (or older role models) and cheer positively for the efforts of all the athletes, the positive experience of enjoying a sporting event is not to be under-appreciated!  While all of this excitement has been happening we’ve also seen the discipline of many of our students to attend classes and, in some cases, take tests despite the energy of these athletic contests happening just steps away.  
  2. Bonds created by hosting students from other schools last for a long time!  As the week progressed I saw more and more of our students walking around, chatting, and just hanging out with kids from the other schools.  Many times the connections between these students were formed when one student-athlete played the role of host to the other.  Initially, hosting guest student-athletes was a cost saving measure but now it’s grown to so much more than that.  Living under the same roof, if only for a couple days, creates a bond between these young adults that is stronger than the competition.  It’s a unique experience, one that helps these kids realize that it’s not all about the numbers on the scoreboard at the end of the game.  
  3. Hard work prevailing isn’t just something from Hollywood, it actually happens!  Watching some of the games over the course of the tournament, it became very obvious as to who “should” win particular matchups.  However, in a number of cases, the “underdog” showed that hard work and perseverance can win out over a more “talented” opponent.  Teamwork, effort, and fundamentals became more than buzz-words, they became rallying cries and motivation!   As educators, how can we transfer that attitude into the classroom?
  4. Attitude is everything!  The last time we hosted CAISSA I was blown away by the effort and dedication of our JV girls Volleyball team as they battled against all the varsity squads.  Once again, the JV teams have impressed beyond my imagination. The girls soccer team has been competitive and fought hard against every opponent they’ve faced, never hanging their heads or giving up despite facing tough varsity level competition.  Our JV boys on the basketball court have faced, whether fairly or not, the best that each of the varsity teams have had to offer.  Whether a tough opponent, a bad shooting day, or injured teammates, our JV athletes have fought through and left every ounce of energy on the court/field.

CAISSA has been a nice interlude for our community.  The positive atmosphere of support and hard work from our athletes and community has been wonderful to see.  It’s not all about academics when it comes to school, CAISSA  was a nice reminder of that fact.  We’re helping transform young adults into adults, that extends well beyond the books!!

Teenagers – Wild Animals

Bret Olson1 Comment

IMG_5524Last week Amy and I went to the coast to see Humpback Whales.  Just before we got on the boat our guide gave us the whole safety routine, then added one more piece that got me thinking.  Basically he said, these are wild animals and we never know what they’re going to do, we can’t predict their behavior so they may be jumping or we may not see anything, it’s nature.  

While we were motoring around looking for and watching whales I had a lot of time to think and I began connecting our guide’s warnings about wild animals to what we experience with teenagers on a regular basis.  Many outsiders, those NOT in education, view these lovely young adults as wild animals.  As I think about it, they’re not totally wrong!

Teens, the human variety, are capable of very high level thinking and processing.  They are empathetic, sympathetic, and very resilient.  Additionally, they are also full of hormones and are constantly changing.  In that regard they could be looked at much like the Humpback Whales I was hoping to see jumping all around me – wild and unpredictable.  

It would probably be a bit strange if I rallied all the teachers around each morning and reminded everyone about teenagers, “remember, these creatures are unpredictable…it’s nature, please be patient!”  However, it wouldn’t be untrue.  We’re dealing with some of the most diverse and rapidly changing brains in the world, no matter how well we think we know them nothing can be taken for granted.

The captain of our boat has been taking people on tours to watch whales for years now, he knows these waters and he has learned a lot about the movements of these massive mammals.  In an attempt to understand the wild, teenage minds that we encounter each day we work to establish positive relationships with our students.  By learning about their personalities we can better anticipate their learning styles and needs, much like the captain of our boat learning to anticipate the whales’ next move. We also have to remember that their brains are changing, each day may not guarantee the same interactions and behaviors as the last.

Keeping in mind that our kids are constantly changing is extremely important for the success of our young students.  Just as there will be days when the whales jump and there will be days when they don’t, the same can be said of our students – there will be good days and bad.  Also similar to the whales, we won’t ever know when these “jumping days” will happen for our students nor do we know when a bad day will strike.  The whales don’t jump every day but that doesn’t mean the captains don’t take tour groups out to sea in an effort to see them.  In the same spirit we must prepare to give every student the opportunity to “jump” each time we see them.

Creating the opportunity for kids to “jump” is what education is all about.  It won’t happen if they’re not comfortable and prepared, nor is it something we can force.  Each student is going to “jump” differently depending on a wide variety of factors.  Be ready for anything from these wild young minds, create the opportunity, and enjoy the show!  

What 6th Graders Know, That We (Adults) Have Forgotten

Bret Olson1 Comment

This past week I spent four days with the 6th graders on their “Week Without Walls” trip.  Being outdoors, in the fresh air and away from the day-to-day rhythm that life naturally falls into gave me a great chance to step back and think about a lot of things.  While most of my time was occupied by 30 11-year olds, I also had the chance to be inspired on a number of occasions by these dynamic pre-teens.

Believe it or not, one of the most inspiring moments of the trip came thanks to some good old fashioned 6th grade dramatics.  In brief, a couple kids were “in a fight”, there was a misunderstanding that had blown out of proportion because each side felt they were right.  After a long mediation session each of these young adults was able to see the other’s perspective.  They resolved, for the future, to better communicate and seek to find a resolution before reaching such elevated levels of conflict.  At the end of the day this interaction could’ve been any two 6th graders, anywhere in the world…there was nothing particularly special about the interaction.  However, it seemed special at the time and it got me thinking…

Why is it so easy for our students (the younger ones in particular) to forgive and forget?  How do they so easily move on from such interactions?  After thinking about this and watching with a more focused eye, I think I saw some hints as to what might be the real secret – it comes down to their relationships and their flexibility.

One fact is simple, they’re malleable.  These young minds are fully aware that they, in fact, don’t know everything.  They can step back and admit that they were wrong or that they could’ve handled a situation better and they grow from it, they truly are reflective creatures (even if that doesn’t always seem to be the case!)  I often wonder, as we go along the road to adulthood, does this skill fade…do we become the “old dog” who can’t “learn new tricks”?  Or does our Mindset change as we age and, supposedly, grow wiser?

They’re empathetic as well.  It’s one thing to be malleable, but if you can’t see the other side then how can you grow?  It hit me like a ton of bricks how empathy just oozes out of these kids.  As adults I expect that many of these kids will brush off such “childish” issues in the future, but right now they have a superhuman ability to truly feel the emotions of their friends (and even sometimes their combatants).  This can prove difficult when ten kids are reacting to one friend’s pain/heartache/perceived injustice, but when it comes to conflict resolution this empathy is a true superpower!

Most importantly, however, these 6th graders know each other and they know each other well.  They’ve built relationships consistently for a long time (some of them for years).  Some are better friends and have more positive relationships than others but there is a certain level of understanding that exists amongst all of these kids.  They know each other’s secrets and they know each other’s buttons (and how to push them!)  As 6th graders, these kids are in the beginning stages of learning to interact successfully with their peers provided all of these new-found interpersonal insights.  For some it has opened doors, they’ve built their friend circle and are enjoying the fruits of such understandings.  The relationships they’ve built can withstand misunderstandings and “fights”.  These kids can fully engage in a disagreement, resolve the issues and go back to being best friends within minutes…it truly is a superpower.

As educators, and people in general, I believe that we have a lot to learn from these young minds.  While watching and learning from these mini-adults I realized I needed to work harder myself.  It dawned on me that I didn’t know these kids as well as some groups of kids I’ve worked with in the past.  I was forced to consider how this could impact my interactions with them.  Had I built up enough of a positive relationship with each of these kids?  Enough to withstand a difficult conversation and still come away with a mutual level of respect?  Since so many of my student interactions tend to be related to behavior or academic discipline I grew concerned.  Luckily I’ve been down this road and I feel confident in my ability to build relationships…I jumped right in and began connecting with students – it turned out to be the best part of my week!

How have you worked to connect with your students?  Have you built the level of relationship that is strong enough to withstand those difficult moments and come out the other side strong?

Take a step back and think about the relationships you’ve built…could they be strengthened?  I know I’ll be working hard to (re)connect with students over the coming weeks, especially those with whom my connections are weakest.  Building the positive couldn’t be more important and it’s never too late to jump in!

Fiestas de Quito

Bret Olson1 Comment

I thought about going against the obvious this week and NOT writing about Fiestas de Quito but after experiencing such amazing performances by our Middle School and High School students I just couldn’t resist celebrating the awesomeness!!

In the weeks leading up to Fiestas de Quito there has been a lot of time and energy put into this celebration of the founding of Quito.  Our Spanish Department deserves a lot of recognition for the time, effort, and crazy amounts of energy they’ve put into helping our students plan such beautiful performances.  Being new to Quito I couldn’t quite fathom the scale to which this celebration would go, it was mind-blowing!  ¡Muchas gracias!

Our students held nothing back and demonstrated an amazing amount of pride, not only in Quito, but in themselves and the work they put in preparing for these performances.  To watch our students push themselves out of their comfort zones while on stage in front of a standing-room only crowd was absolutely inspiring.  I’m impressed more and more everyday with the level to which our students are willing to be risk takers.  However, Fiestas de Quito took that to a whole new level, providing them with a context in which they were engaged and excited to share their efforts and talents with our community.

As educators this is what we strive for, creating an atmosphere for our students that allows them to take risks, learn, and grow in a manner that is comfortable for them.  As I walk around Academia Cotopaxi I see this happening everyday.  Our students are comfortable in their classes and feel safe in their learning environment.  Students see their teachers and the other adults at school as people who care about them, people they can go to if they need help.  The positive relationships we build with our students here at AC create an atmosphere filled with daily opportunities to learn and grow.

Fiestas de Quito is a wonderful opportunity for our community to come together and celebrate the amazing city we are privileged to call home.  As you enjoy the festivities and revelry take a second to stop and think about how you are working to build the positive.  Have a look at this very brief post by best-selling author Jon Gordon.  He talks about the power of positive interactions and the ratio of positive to negative that his research shows to be the tipping point for effectiveness.  It’s very interesting and has applications to life in general (and certainly has implications for the classroom).  Very interesting stuff 🙂

Enjoy the music and parades everyone!  

¡Viva Quito!

Inspiration from Harvard Graduate School of Education

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This week I had a whole other topic written out and then I came across some great stuff.  I was reading through a few of my older Marshall Memos when I stumbled upon some awesome videos.  If you follow this link you can see Eight 8-minute talks about education from the Harvard Graduate School of Education:  http://www.gse.harvard.edu/news/14/09/8×8-hgse-faculty-share-their-bold-ideas-improve-education

I highly recommend any of the eight videos but these specific few may be more relevant to our context than the others.  Here are the relevant titles along with Kim Marshall’s brief summaries of each.  Do your students a favor and take 8 minutes to watch one of these (or more) videos.

• Karen Brennan: Getting Unstuck – Helping students and teachers move beyond using social media and use computers more powerfully. Brennan describes using ScratchEd, a platform for creating projects, and students’ problem-solving strategies when they’re stuck.

• Todd Rose: The End of Average (Bret’s personal favorite) – What neuroscientists have found about how differently people remember and process information, leading to the conclusion that we can’t understand individual brains by using group averages. The same goes for how we deal with students; we must treat them as individuals, which we now can do better with recent advances in classroom technology.

• Karen Mapp: Linking Family Engagement to Learning – Relationships between schools and families have to be relational, interactive, collaborative, developmental, and linked to what students are learning, says Mapp, so that families can be more effective supporting learning at home. In particular, Mapp is critical of traditional open-house meetings in schools.

• Howard Gardner: Beyond Wit and Grit  – Our understanding of “wit” has been expanded to include multiple intelligences, says Gardner, and we now realize the importance of “grit” – the cluster of non-cognitive skills. But these are not enough. Gardner believes we also need a moral dimension. “You can have plenty of grit, and multiple wits,” he says, “but they need to be directed towards becoming a good person, a good worker, and a good citizen… There’s a ‘triple helix’ of good work and good citizenship: excellence, ethics, and engagement.”

Building Positive Student-Teacher Relationships

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This week we finally got to one of my favorite initiatives at SCIS, our SIPs program.  The opportunity to work with colleagues and grow as educators is an energizing and inspiring experience for me.  Our SIPs plan this year has been designed to focus on our six major “look fors” as well as help to integrate technology into our classrooms.  This past Wednesday I was fortunate enough to present with three of our brave colleagues.  I presented my SIP on Building and Fostering Positive Student-Teacher Relationships.  For those of you who were in the Google Sketchup session with Ross I’d like to share the general premise of what was happening across the hall…

As educators we are responsible for our students for more than 7 hours a day, five days a week.  We are the adults that have the most regular contact with these students, in almost every case they spend more time with us than with their parents.  They come to us during one of the most tumultuous periods of their lives and want nothing more than to be believed in, trusted, and cared about.  Middle School students want to fit in and they want to feel that they are important.  Last week when I visited classes as a student I was on the watch for “feeling like a nuisance” but I couldn’t find it…we already have a very good positive culture here at SCIS.  I, however, am a big Jim Collins fan and want to see us take our school “from good to great”.

I’ve been informed by a certain High School math teacher that my two cents “have turned into more like 8 cents” so I’m going to leave it at that for today but, as promised in my SIP, I am attaching a number of great links about building and fostering positive student-teacher relationships and classroom culture:

Building Connections With All Students

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As we pick up steam and near the halfway mark of the first quarter (time flies!) I would like to challenge you to think of the connections you have made with your students…now, think even more carefully about those students you haven’t connected with yet. Why haven’t you connected with them? Most likely it is because you and they haven’t found that natural “click” that leads to those bonds being built. The attached article summary looks, rather specifically, at different ways to help you break through with boys in particular. As with the last couple articles, this one provides actionable tips that require no extra time or planning…just effort and a conscious attempt to forge a relationship with some of your students; those with whom you may not have found that natural connection. Give it a look, try some out, and let me know what you think…as usual, I’d love to hear your two cents 🙂

This article summary came from the Marshall Memo, an amazing professional resource!

Originally published in SCIS MS Headlines on September 6, 2013.